The wedding might be over, but your to-do list isn’t quite finished. After the honeymoon glow starts to settle, it’s time to face one last (important) task: writing thank-you cards.
If the idea of writing dozens or even hundreds of handwritten notes feels overwhelming to you, you’re not alone. Many people struggle with procrastination, writer’s block, and simply not knowing where to start, which can lead to putting off this task. However, once you begin, you may find that it’s not as daunting as it seems. The sooner you complete the notes, the better you’ll feel.
With a little planning and some old-school etiquette wisdom from Emily Post, here’s everything you need to know to knock out your wedding thank-you cards without stressing over them.
Who Needs a Note?
Pretty much anyone who gave you a gift, whether it was something from your registry, cash, a donation in your name, or even a meaningful handwritten card. Even if you said “thank you” in person, it’s still polite (and expected) to follow up with a written note.
Some newlyweds send thank-you cards to their guests as a gesture of appreciation for the gifts they received and for celebrating with them.
Who Should Write the Note?
The person who received the gift should write the note. You and your partner can split the thank-you note duties however works best for you. One of you can take your side of the guest list, or you can divvy them up alphabetically. If a gift was intended for one of you (such as a set of golf clubs from your uncle), that person should write the note.
When Should Thank-You Notes Be Written?
The best rule of thumb is to try and send all your wedding thank-you notes within three months after the wedding. However, if more time has passed, don’t worry, late thank-you notes are always better than none.
If you receive gifts before the wedding, feel free to get a head start and send those thank-you notes right away. Writing notes as soon as presents arrive helps prevent an overwhelming backlog later and keeps the process manageable.
What About Email?
Handwriting thank-you notes is always the way to go. It’s more personal and thoughtful than email or text. Stick to traditional mail even if you sent digital invitations.
Can a Thank-You Note Be Creative?
Absolutely. Incorporating photos, children’s drawings, or anything at all that complements the sentiment is appropriate. Just remember to include a short, written thank-you as well.
Keep Your Stationery Consistent
Remember, it’s not just paper, it sets the tone for your celebration. If you have the budget, consider ordering personalized thank-you cards that match your wedding invitations. If not, don’t worry. Just find something that complements the theme, color, or style of your wedding.
Have a System for Opening and Tracking Your Wedding Gifts
Opening wedding gifts is a lot of fun, but it can feel overwhelming when you have so many to open at once. To avoid the classic “Wait… who gave us this?” moment later, it’s best to have a system in place.
Take a moment to sit down with your partner and open one gift at a time. Write down the name of each gift along with the name of the person who gave it. You can track this information in whatever way works best for you, but we recommend keeping all guest information, gift details, and thank-you note statuses in one organized place for easy reference.
To help you stay organized, we’ve created a downloadable wedding guest list spreadsheet. If you haven’t already, download this convenient tool, it’s perfect for managing your guest list, tracking gifts, and organizing thank-you cards. Use it to keep track of:
- Guest names and address
- What each guest gave you.
- Any special memories or details to include in your thank-you notes
- Whether you’ve sent their thank-you yet
Pro tip: Snap a quick photo of each gift as you open it. If gifts get packed away or mixed up later, the photos will help jog your memory when writing notes.
Getting organized now will save you tons of time and hassle down the road!
Share the Workload
Divide this task with your partner to avoid overwhelming either party. Assign recipients based on who knows the guest better.
Pro tip: Once you’ve finished writing and mailing the thank-you notes, celebrate by having a romantic night in. This will help make the task feel less like a chore!
How To Make Writing Thank-You Notes Fun?
Getting gifts is always fun! However, writing thank-you notes can be a daunting task. Some people dread writing the notes so much that they end up putting them off until it seems too late to write any.
But here’s the good news: with a little planning, you can make it enjoyable (or at least not dreadful).
Make It a Game or Set Small Goals
Try turning it into a fun challenge. For example, after every 5 or 10 notes, treat yourself to a break, a snack, or something you enjoy. If your family is helping, turn it into a friendly competition. Just make sure everyone’s still putting care into their messages!
Break It Up
Don’t try to write them all in one sitting. Spread it out over a few days. Set the mood with your favorite playlist, a cozy drink, or a square of chocolate. Whatever makes you feel relaxed and focused.
Give It Your Full Attention
Rather than trying to write thank-you notes during chores or work, dedicate quiet time to do so. This will allow you to think more clearly, making your notes feel more thoughtful and personal.
Try to Enjoy It
Saying thank you should not feel difficult. With the right mindset, it can be an excellent way to reflect on all the love and support you have received.
What to Include in a Wedding Thank-You Card
Writing a wedding thank-you note is pretty simple, but adding a few important details can make it feel more personal. Each card should have five main parts:
-
Greet the Gift Giver by Name
Always begin your note by personally addressing the gift giver. This small gesture immediately sets a warm and appreciative tone.
-
Clearly and Sincerely Say “Thank You”
Start your message with a direct expression of gratitude. Let the recipient know right away how thankful you are for their kindness, presence, or gift.
-
Mention the Gift Specifically
When expressing gratitude, be sure to include the name of the gift you received. This demonstrates attention to detail and reassures the giver that their thoughtful present was both received and appreciated. If the gift was monetary, thank them for their generosity and explain how you plan to use it.
-
Add a Personal Touch About the Gift
Share a sentence or two about how you plan to use the gift or why it’s special to you as a couple.
Example:
“We’re so excited to fire up the pizza oven when the weather warms up!”
or “It already has the perfect spot in our living room.”
-
Sign Off with Both Your Names
Make sure to sign the note from both you and your spouse to show your shared gratitude.
Bonus Tip: Double-check the card before sending. Make sure to include the names of all the gift givers, even if you’re only close to one of them. Overlooking a name can unintentionally cause hurt feelings.
Final Note
Hopefully, these tips will help when you’re staring at the long list of thank-you notes you need to write.
For thank-you notes, invitations, and all your wedding paper needs, check out the talented stationers on Happily Connected. Their creativity and expertise can help bring your vision to life and set the perfect tone for your special day.